In a world where it seems like the rules are stacked against men, it's time to get real about what it takes to meet women and make a connection.
Psycho Hack Team
4 min read
The Harsh Reality
You're a man in your early 20s, and you're wondering where you're supposed to meet women. The truth is, it's not about where you meet them, it's about how you approach them. You can't just hit on women at work, or on social media, or in a bar, without expecting some serious backlash. And if you do manage to get a date, it's not like you're guaranteed a second one.
The Problem with Your Approach
The problem isn't that you're not allowed to talk to women, it's that you're coming at them with the wrong attitude. You're assuming that women are just waiting around for you to come along and sweep them off their feet, and that's just not how it works. Women have their own lives, their own interests, and their own boundaries. And if you're not respecting those boundaries, you're going to get shut down.
Understanding the Social Contract
The social contract is all about understanding and respecting the unwritten rules of social interaction. It's about knowing when to approach someone, and when to back off. It's about being able to read the room, and to understand when someone is interested, and when they're not. And it's about being respectful of people's boundaries, even if you don't like them.
The Brad Pitt Rule
You've probably heard of the Brad Pitt rule, which says that if you're hot enough, you can get away with anything. But the truth is, that's not how it works. The rule is really about people getting to decide who they want to talk to, and when, and about what. It's about respecting people's autonomy, and their right to choose who they want to interact with.
How to Actually Meet Women
So, how do you actually meet women? It's not about trying to pick them up, or to get them to go on a date with you. It's about being a decent human being, and treating them with respect. It's about being interested in them as people, and not just as potential conquests. And it's about being able to have a conversation, without trying to steer it towards sex or dating.
Read the Room
The first step is to read the room. If you're not in a social venue, pay attention to who's actually interested in talking, and who's giving you the cold shoulder. If you're not sure, err on the side of caution, and don't push it.
Don't Do Approaches
The second step is to don't do approaches. Don't just hit on women, or try to pick them up. Instead, strike up a conversation like a normal person. Ask them about their interests, or their day, or their thoughts on something. Be genuine, and be respectful.
Focus on Your Social Skills
The third step is to focus on your social skills. Being fun to talk to, and being able to make people feel good when they chat with you, is key. It's not about being the hottest, or the richest, or the most famous. It's about being able to connect with people, and to make them feel valued and respected.
Traditional Gender Roles
You may have come across the idea that women like men who take charge, or who are dominant. But the truth is, that's not a universal truth. Some women like that, while others prefer a more submissive partner. And it's not just about gender roles, it's about being a decent human being, and treating your partner with respect.
Shouldering Your Share of the Labor
What women often mean when they say they want a man to take charge is that they want someone who will shoulder their share of the labor in a relationship. They want someone who will be present, and who will take an active role in planning dates, and managing the relationship. It's not about being dominant, it's about being a partner.
Conclusion
Meeting women isn't about following a set of rules, or about trying to manipulate them into going on a date with you. It's about being a decent human being, and treating them with respect. It's about being interested in them as people, and not just as potential conquests. And it's about being able to have a conversation, without trying to steer it towards sex or dating. So, go out there, and be yourself. Be respectful, be genuine, and be kind. And you might just find that you're able to meet women, and to make a connection, without even trying.
